I WRITE INSTEAD

I'm a good listener; I have a few good friends in my life, and I'm always willing to listen to their stories instead of talking about my self. I enjoy it most of the time, even when I disagree with the stories that they're telling me. 

I have this terrible habit of giving people advice, even though they never asked me in the first place. But sometimes, at the end of a conversation about what they told me and what did advice to them, they thank me. Those times, I think they approach me looking for a different point of view. I have been in any situation when it comes to giving advice. 

One time, a good friend stopped talking to me for a couple of weeks because she was processing what I said to her and because she was a little mad at me. I remember her telling me how she felt regarding my words, and how it took her those days to recover strength and get back to me with an answer. That incident got my feet back to Earth and made me realized that I was nobody to form an opinion about someone's life. I apologized to her, and I learned that sometimes I need to be just the friend, sometimes they only need someone to listen to them with no opinion. 

Even though I enjoy listening, some other times, I want to share things and want someone to hear me. When these days arrive, I think on the right people to do that; my sister is the first to pop on my mind, then my best friend, and then my second best friend. I make the calls, but apparently, everyone is very busy at that moment. 

When I finally made to talk to someone, it seems that they are more focus on what they want to say instead of what I need to share with them. And if I'm lucky and I made someone to listen to me, that person stays quiet until I finish my story so he can continue talking, but no comment, no opinion, no advice for me. 

So I try again and call the next person on the list. But, funny thing, the same happens again, and again. I admit, few times happen that the last person I called, actually listens to me and other few times gives me advice or says something! But are the less. 

It's the same feeling that when everybody else thinks you're strong enough to be sad, to be broke, to cry or even complain about something. But, when someone needs to cry, automatically knows that you're the person for that, and If you say something like: "put yourself together! Problems exist in life! Shit happens! Accept that and deal with it", well, you may be a tough person, an insensitive human been, or even an ununderstanding friend. And you can't cry about anything, because the day you do, everybody looks so disappointed and heartbroken. 

Therefore, when I need someone to listen to me, I write instead. 

Then, I read what I wrote as a third person, and I try to give her advice. 

Sometimes I give her a speech and a few slaps, but yes, it works!